The Astrominals

 

The 10 Best Things About Being a Capricorn, by Cap the Goat

We asked Cap the Goat, the Capricorn Astrominal, to write a list of the ten best things about being a Capricorn (22 December – 19 January).

Cap sent it back a day early, with a contents page and a short summary at the top that said: “Capricorns: very good. Details below.”

1. We set goals, and reach them

Other signs say “one day”. Capricorns say “Thursday”. Then it’s done by Wednesday.

2. We’re excellent climbers

Goats can climb cliffs that look impossible. Capricorns climb problems that look impossible. Same technique: one careful step at a time.

3. We’re dependable

Need something done properly? Ask a Capricorn. We’ll do it right the first time, so nobody has to do it twice.

4. We’re ruled by Saturn

Saturn is the planet of hard work, patience and very impressive rings. We’d like to point out it has a lot of rings. It earned them.

5. We’re secretly very funny

Capricorns have the driest sense of humour in the zodiac. You might not notice the joke. That’s part of the joke.

6. We get better with age

Capricorns are born a bit grown-up and then get more relaxed every year. By ninety we’ll be the life and soul of the party.

7. We’re good with money

Every penny counts. A Capricorn’s piggy bank is never empty. It’s also labelled, and has a five-year plan.

8. We’re patient

The mountain isn’t going anywhere. Neither are we. We’ll get to the top. We’ve packed a sandwich.

9. We’re loyal

A Capricorn doesn’t make friends quickly, but when we do, it’s for keeps. We’ll still be there in forty years. Probably organising the reunion.

10. We finish things

The last page of the book. The last bit of the jigsaw. The last step to the top. Capricorns don’t stop at nearly.

Cap says: “Ten points, delivered as promised. Next year: twelve. I’ve already drafted them.”

Think you might be a Capricorn at heart? Take the quiz, or meet Cap the Goat and the rest of Team Earth.

Astrological and zoological. Illogically logical.